couple walking
This bride-to-be allowed me to share what God has been teaching her in the months leading up to her wedding.   It is MUCH, MUCH easier to begin to learn to respect and honor your man’s leadership BEFORE marriage!  It sets a firm and solid foundation for your marriage based on God’s Word and His design and teaches you to focus on your man’s needs in a meaningful way that will help establish a very strong marriage.
Thanks so much to this precious sister in Christ for sharing!
Hello Mrs. April,

I am super excited about some things that are going on in my relationship. The Lord has really been guiding both of us since the day of my fiance’s proposal. It is wonderful. But I am here to talk about how the Lord started to change the dynamic in our relationship.

I started this journey I believe (3 months ago) on becoming a respectful girlfriend/fiance/wife.

The beautiful sides to being more respectful are beginning to show.

  • First I had to work on realizing that he was the head. His decisions go (even though we’re not married, I wanted to practice this). If I knew I still had to do something for my life I was able to being that we are yet to be married, but I tried to respect that his input should have more value than before.
  • Next I started calming down more and discussing issues instead of blowing up (still a work in progress).
  • My most recent addition is giving him time to make decisions, whether they are big or small.

There are other things I am sure, but those are the biggest ones that I have noticed in my life.

I thought that this would take forever before I would see the fruits of my efforts.  (From Peacefulwife – it takes a lot longer the more damage there has been in the relationship – the more wounded the man is, the longer the process, and the more obedient to God a woman is, that helps to speed things up many times.)

I know for a fact that there is more to learn and more to see, but the Lord knew that I might need encouragement along the way.

My fiance has actually started to make decisions on his own.

We are able to have in-depth discussions more often because
  • He is sharing his thoughts more freely than before.
  • He has been listening to the Lord and can trust that I will abide by the answer, or at least be open to discuss the responses.

Two things surprised me the most.

1. We were talking about how we felt about our wedding night (nervous, scared, etc). I brought up the situation of what would happen if I ended up pregnant despite birth control. I gave him time to think about it and left it at that (this was Wednesday of last week). Yesterday he texted me and said that the Lord had told him the answer. He brought up the conversation himself.
2. The  thing that shocked me today was I told him how I will probably miss Bible study tomorrow because of my chiropractic appointment. It was going to be my favorite topic. Without me ever suggesting it, he said that we can go over it together on Thursday.

I never knew that the Lord could work this fast, but seeing my fiance just trusting me is amazing.  Seeing how he is being more of a leader instead of a follower really opens up the doors for me to respect him more easily. It is still going to be a challenge, but I know for a fact that the Lord has kept us on the right path.

Thank you for your amazing blog. It really is touching my life in a mighty way.
(From Peacefulwife – the AMAZING part is TOTALLY a GOD thing. 🙂  He is SO VERY GOOD!)
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