These are some thoughts on characteristics of godly femininity from a 29 year old Christian single man:
You know what’s a huge blessing from women as sisters in Christ or anything?
- Just the simple sight of empathy and compassion. Like even if she has NO idea or NO understanding of why something makes me upset, sad, happy, joyful, whatever, the kinds of women who show that they’re simply sad because you’re sad, happy because you’re happy, and so on, are just amazing company and a huge blessing. I’m saying this just apart from what I’ve been saying about what a blessing it is to see women make an effort to understand men, even if that’s coming as difficult, just that matching response is just absolutely huge. In a way, it’s like she holds up that emotion with a man on a pure and unrefined level that makes it easier to shoulder.
Her price is far, FAR above rubies.
- Another thing that blesses me is NOT being treated like I’m suspicious. I’ve never messed around with a woman in my life (it’ll never happen) and indications that there’s no suspicion in her about me, and therefore no implicit accusation, is a tremendous blessing. Why? Probably because it allows me to think that I’m seen as a potential “protector” much more than one to be “protected from.” I KNOW women don’t like to be treated with accusation or suspicion either–trust (in general) is risky, no doubt about it! But there’s something probably a little unique about that dynamic between male/female.
- I remember a little anecdote (not about me) but about a guy/gal who were dating in college. The guy kind of had an obsession over details, so somebody walked into his room and rearranged his DVDs on his shelf to tease him. He said to his girlfriend, “how do you think he’s going to respond to that?” She replied. “He’s going to see that and rearrange them back without saying a single word.” That’s exactly what he (the boyfriend) did when he got back (we were all hanging around). I just thought it was neat that she did a good job getting to know him well enough like that.
- One young lady I mentioned simply took me very seriously. She would really remember things I would say. I remember putting up a little “about myself quiz” online, which was something a lot of us put up, and amazingly she got the highest score for the one I made for myself out of anybody! I was embarrassed that I didn’t do so well on hers! I’m sure it’s not just me: just a wonderfully feminine way of being a kind listener and she studies people.
- I can think of a woman I thanked God so much for coming upon just seemed to have an amazing and rare ability to perceive how feminist messages would hurt men. She has so much insight on how to have compassion for men and I assume she’s a wonderful wife (haven’t met her in person), much like yourself PW I think she has tremendous dignity in herself as a woman which is *SO WONDERFUL!!!* I LOVE seeing women love themselves, esteeming their abilities to nurture! I was blessed to hear her talk to men with so much compassion, like advising them not to marry someone who saw them as an “oppressor” as she would never be able to respect a man. I just got a feeling that made me think, wow, actually knows how to look after men! To be quite frank, it was an incredible relief to see that a woman could show compassion for men without worrying about it hurting some universal “sisterhood” (like a female tag-team regardless of how some of them hurt men), and she could actually come to a man’s defense. And this is kind of my dirty secret: it means a lot to me to see that a woman is capable of showing that she’s on the team of the men she loves (along with women, of course) more than automatically siding with a far-out “sisterhood” she doesn’t even know or doesn’t have any reason for siding with other than that they’re also female.
- I knew another woman who had a graceful voice. I can’t even imagine her yelling. I didn’t know her too well, but it’s a blessing to feel safe like that. Really attentive and non-threatening.
- I love the way feminine women are sensitive to emotions and scramble to make the social environment comfortable. I love the way they dutifully get to know people. I remember a particular lady friend I had who probably remembers things I said years ago better than I do–I think she stores that info and studies it, and only for constructive purposes for anyone who she gets to know in such a manner. I love the way they come across as anything but threatening. I remember another feminine woman who had a way of giving me 110% of her attention the instant I started speaking–just incredible the comfort her mannerisms gave me, putting me at perfect ease to speak as I felt I needed; a subtle but incredibly powerful interaction.
- Most of all, women who make the effort–exceptionally rare as they are–who are indeed eager to see the hero come out of a man and make an effort to learn about the opposition that he faces: not just mercilessly telling him to “be a man” without any regard for understanding his situation. *They manage to convince me that we’re actually on the same team*, they care about my interests just as they want me to care about theirs.
A feminine woman may look lovely or plain in a still shot, but she is invariably, staggeringly beautiful when she begins to move or speak, with grace, subtlety and gentleness.