Lee Ann is a Christian single woman in her early 30s. I appreciate her willingness to allow me to share her response to another sister in Christ about this topic as a post. It seems that having marriage or a boyfriend is so often the biggest dream we as women have. We can get really desperate about it sometimes. Lee Ann has discovered the doorway to the path to contentment that I long for each of us to find. Please keep in mind that the same principles apply to any dream we hold dearly to our hearts. We find freedom in Christ as we release our dreams and lay them on the altar, allowing Him to direct our steps according to His will, not ours. Even when we are married, we must still lay down the dream that our husbands will meet the needs that only Christ can meet. Satisfaction is found in Jesus alone! Not in anyone or anything in this world!
I didn’t release my dream/idol over days or even weeks. It was a LONG journey. I was terrified that if I truly surrendered it to God, that He would make sure it didn’t happen, just because He could. I was certain that letting it go would be the nail in the coffin, as they say. I truly believed that He wanted to take this away from me as a punishment for wanting it so badly.
What He began to show me is that I truly didn’t know Him. If I did, I wouldn’t doubt Him or His ways so much. I had a warped sense of who He was.
I started searching everything I could find about the attributes of God. I had to prayerfully consider things I read and ask opinions of those I trust. I will be honest and tell you that I really struggled with the Old vs New Testament. I didn’t understand how God doesn’t change, but He seemed so different. I was terrified of God I read about in the Old Testament and enamored with God I read about in the New Testament. This took me on the journey of how, why, when…. It took me on a journey of chasing Jesus. I read and prayed, and prayed and read. I was determined to understand to the best of my ability.
After I discovered who God was, and I say discovered because it was all new to me, I no longer felt like I was losing a dream. I felt like I was gaining an understanding and a path that was truth. I wasn’t losing anything; I was replacing my longing with contentment. I wasn’t giving up a dream; I was gaining an eternal perspective. I wasn’t missing out; I was standing in the center of His will. I wasn’t walking in to being forever broken-hearted; I was rejoicing with the joy of the Lord in my heart.
What I never realized is that giving up the dream of a man was the absolute best thing that ever happened to me.
I wouldn’t have started the journey of discovering who God was, if He hadn’t prompted me to give it up. I wouldn’t have understood the comfort and guidance of the Holy Spirit if I hadn’t walked away from the altar. I wouldn’t have know this unshakeable, unchangeable, full, rich, complete, perfect love of my Savior. Simply put, I wouldn’t have been an active participant in my relationship with God. I would have been a bystander, with His love, mercy, grace, conviction, power, authority, and Spirit swirling around me, but never being a part of me. THIS journey is why I know who God is. It is why I trust Him. It is why I can say that Jesus fills a void that cannot be touch by a man. The idol of a man was my set of blinders and what was keeping me from knowing Him, truly KNOWING Him.
He asked me to give up my dream not to hurt me, but to fill me up!
If you will allow Him, He will blow your mind with who He is. You are at the beginning stages of the most exciting journey you will ever go on. Those moments when you are reading and you light up!! Eek!! I am SO excited for you. Feed yourself! Taste and see that He is good! I am sitting at my desk with tears streaming down my face. I just whispered that I want a fresh taste of that journey. … I don’t want to grow stale. I don’t want to take His love for granted. I want that passion daily ignited in my heart.
Who Is God? by David Platt
Who Is God by John Piper
What Are the Attributes of God by www.gotquestions.org