This list can vary from man to man. And I have a feeling that some of these things may surprise you. Many women don’t see any problem with some of these behaviors – but if your man suddenly goes silent or becomes angry – chances are good that he may have just felt disrespected by you. Learn to stop the disrespect and start to treat him with respect and watch your relationship blossom!
- telling him what to do/how to do it/when to do it
- arguing with him
- continuing to question and question after he has given his answer – not dropping the subject
- spying on him
- interrogating him
- having a critical spirit and constantly putting him down with criticism
- acting holier-than-thou, thinking you are better than he is, more spiritual, etc.
- jumping in to help if he didn’t ask you for help (can be seen as insulting)
- asking “why?” “Why would you do it THAT way?” (implies you think he is incompetent or stupid)
- putting him down in front of other people, or behind his back
- joking at his expense
- complaining about something he spent time and effort doing for you
- demanding he do something
- body language like rolling your eyes, sighing, huffing, hands on hips, fingers tapping, throwing your hands up in the air – like you think he is an idiot
- using an angry mother tone of voice
- scolding him
- verbally attacking him
- bringing up past sins of his that you had forgiven already
- comparing him to other men
- flirting with other men when you are in a committed relationship with him
- thinking that your feeling loved is more important than his feeling respected
- thinking that you are “always right” and therefore he is “always wrong”
- yelling, throwing things, cussing, hitting (this stuff is EXTREME disrespect – do NOT go there!)
- labeling his weaknesses and sins as much worse than yours – thinking you are morally superior to him
- making a really small issue more important than the relationship
- correcting him
- taking over and trying to force him to do things
- trying to change him
- acting like being a guy is wrong instead of just different
- answering for him
- apologizing and then saying, “BUT if you had done X…” (that negated the apology!)
- idolizing him and expecting him to be 100% responsible for your happiness instead of finding your own joy and contentment fully in Christ
- being a black hole of unending neediness and insecurity
- act like he can’t handle something and is incompetent, incapable, irresponsible, etc.
This is not an exhaustive list – gentlemen, would you like to add anything else?
Here’s a little secret about men, ladies!
They don’t do a lot of wonderful things for people when they feel disrespected. If a man is feeling disrespected, he is not going to care about your feelings very much – or about what you want. If you want him to care about your feelings, treat him with respect. Then he will respect you and be able to care about your feelings and desires.